I first saw the trailer for Clash of the Titans during an advanced screening of the Sherlock Holmes movie in December, 2009. My reaction was juvenile, as I wanted to immediately stand on my chair and tell everyone how much I loved the original 1981 version. I was, and still am, convinced that I have watched Clash of the Titans more than anyone in that theater and possibly more than anyone reading this blog. I was a toddler when it was released and it held elements that peaked my interest as I progressed in my youth which led to many, many viewings. Shiny swords, a robotic owl, monsters, hot goddess chicks… what’s not to like?
About two weeks ago, I saw a trailer with Medusa and bunch of sword battles. I thought, “oh, this must be the trailer for Clash of the Titans.” At the end of the trailer, it said The Lightning Thief. I nearly dropped my half eaten microwave burrito as I said “no fucking way.” My rage boiled as much as the Kraken himself as I wondered if they would dare make a last minute change to the title of the film. I thought that maybe the film distributor was worried that a younger audience would not recognize Clash of the Titans and would rather take to a name like The Lightning Thief. If that were the case, I’d say fuck the kids because you’d be literally clipping the wings of Pegasus to perform that type of injustice.
A quick google search laid my rage to rest as I discovered that these are two totally different films. To eliminate any further confusion, I will be utilizing the remainder of this blog to point out some similarities and differences between the two.
Both films are based on Greek mythology, which stems the root of this confusion. This biggest difference is that Clash of the Titans takes place in its ancient time when the Greek gods were supposedly prevalent. The Lightning Thief uses this mythology in a modern setting with Zeus setting up camp in New York City and the entrance to the underworld located in Los Angeles. Greek mythology aside, I feel that’s pretty acurate [insert rimshot here].
Poseidon is heavily referenced in both plots as he is the father of the main character in The Lightning Thief and releases the central villain, the Kraken, in Clash of the Titans. Poisonous scorpions also make their appearance toward the end of both films but that’s expected as they are pretty much the cockroaches of the Greek mythological world. Which will make sense in The Lightning Thief when the scorpion appears in New York City [insert 2nd rimshot here].
For me, the deal maker/breaker between the two films are the main characters. Clash of the Titans‘ the main character is Perseus, son of Zeus, who battles the Kraken to save the really hot Andromeda. The Lightning Thief‘s main character is Percy Jackson, Poseidon’s dyslexic son, that fights for the safety of his mother so that she can find the right school to treat his ADHD.
Does that last plot sound idiotic? That’s because it is. People watch films for escapism. To forget the real world’s problems and enter a fantasy for an hour and a half. Who the hell wants to pay 10 bucks for a movie about a learning disability? That is, if you really count that as a real disability. You know what people called ADHD in the 80’s? Being rascal. All the kid needed was a few slaps and told to sit still. Call me ol’ fashioned, I guess.
I digress. Don’t waste your money on a Harry Potter wannabe and invest in Clash of the Titans. That is… if you had to make a choice between the two. With the disappointing remake of Planet of the Apes and the movie adaptation of Lost in Space, I’d suggest to save your money all together and wait for the original Clash of the Titans to show up on HBO. Which would then nullify this entire blog entry. Are you mad that I wasted your time? Don’t be. This is by far the most entertaining thing you’ve read all week, I assure you.