Bathroom Door ALWAYS Closes for a Deuce

More than just a nob with a lock...

When I’m home alone, the condition of my bathroom door is subject to the events within.

When I’m going number one and I’m alone, it’s pretty exciting for me to leave the door open.  I feel free.  It was like when I first began wearing boxer shorts.  If I could officially name the feeling, I would call it “naughty freedom.”

However if the game at play is number two, the outcome of the bathroom door is a direct opposite.  Whether I’m alone or in company while putting my city’s sewage system to the test, the door must ALWAYS remain closed.  In fact, I feel even better about the situation if the door is locked.  A safe environment must be created where myself, a porcelain bowl, and my cell phone are one.  Then and only then can my sin be released.

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