The Test of the Plain White Tee

When is it time to get back in shape? I believe mother nature gives us many signs. Of course there’s the major signs, like strokes and/or heart attacks. However there are simpler ones to be found.

In my stand-up comedy act, I talk about one of the signs is to watch my “man-boob” while rubbing on deodorant. While applying my Degree “Arctic Blast” or whatever its called, my man-boob would jump around like a nervous eye ball… kind of like the eye of Sauron in Lord of the Rings. You know, right after Frodo tosses the ring into the lava pit.

Another easy indicator for me is my knees and ankles. Once my BMI is well within its “obese” stage, the joints in my lower extremities start to ache and at times, even give out.

But in the case where your pecs are in place and are blessed with healthy joints, there is still the test of the plain white tee. No, I’m not talking about a crappy pop band. Get a plain white t-shirt and pop that sucker on. Be sure that there’s no graphic on the shirt because that will easily distract you from the matter at hand. Once that white cotton blend is draped over your upper half, take a look at yourself in the mirror. You will now be dealing with two things that don’t lie… a plain white tee and a mirror. If you like the overall shape you see, then great. I’m happy for you. If you’re disgusted at what you see, welcome to my club.

I was low on laundry last night and all that was left was a plain white tee for my sleep attire. Yes, I am disgusted by the shape my body creates. However I was still able to sleep that night because I know that I’m doing something about it. I’m currently calorie counting and having fun doing it. I’ve lost about 12-13 pounds so far. I won’t get too into the details of my diet until I’ve reached my goal, which is to lose 28 pounds.

Until then, I’ll be using this plain white tee to spot check myself every week or so.


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